My Brother
by GeneralOreiusMyHeartxoxo
Summary: "You were watching me need love and attention. You were watching me lose self-esteem. You were watching me when I forgot truth. You were watching me believe lies. You were watching me when I sought understanding...All this time, my own brother only watched." *hiatus*
1. Abandoned

ღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄ƷஐღღஐƸ̵̡Ӝ̵̨̄

** My Brother**

**Chapter One**

_How could you have left  
I was only a young girl  
I needed your help  
I didn't know much of this world  
You said that you loved me  
You said that you cared  
But once you were gone  
I was so very scared_

_So many things we could have done differently_  
_Things we could have fixed_  
_Most of which_  
_By just one simple kiss_

_You used to be my hero_  
_You used to be a dad_  
_But after you were gone_  
_I found things out_  
_Things that were pretty bad_

_You're gone now_  
_And you're not coming back_  
_You know that I love you_  
_But I just have to know_  
_If you got a second chance_  
_Would you still go_

**Josette POV**

Jazzy mounted his big black stallion, grinning at our family. He was so proud to be fighting against those dumb Yankees.

I smiled at my brother, trying so hard to be brave.

Mama hurried to kiss his forehead and whisper to him, making him promise this and that. I followed, clinging to her skirts and staring at Jasper.

He glanced down at me, gaze meeting mine, and his smile faded. "Give me Josette, Ma, will you? We need to talk." He winked at me, causing me to giggle.

"Of course," Mama whispered. I looked at her. Momma was so very proud of Jasper, so very happy he was going with the boys to fight, but of course she was scared, just like the other boy's mamas.

She fidgeted with me, setting me up in front of Jasper, but in an awkward sidesaddle position. I didn't like it. This was not a sidesaddle.

"Josey." Jasper regarded me seriously, and I looked up at him adoringly. "You understand, don't you, sweet?"

I nodded. "You gotta go fight the Yankees and then you coming home." My family had been telling me ever since Mr. Lincoln called for volunteers.

"Right." Jasper's blue eyes sparkled. "I'll be home in just a few weeks, won't I?"

"Yes. Cause you and the boys gonna lick the Yankees." Already, my eyes were filling with tears. I didn't _want_ him to go, I wanted him to_ stay_ and I wanted him to _live_. My mouth opened and I sucked in air to start crying…

"Whoa, Josette." Jasper handed me back to Mother, as she was reaching for me. "Don't cry, baby girl, I'll be home soon. You know that."

Before the words were out of my mouth, a torrent of tears was rushing down my cheeks and I was bawling.

Instantly, I was being rushed to the house by my mother, as my father shook Jasper's hand and sent him off.

Jasper was gone.

_Don't cry, baby girl. I'll be home soon._

LINE BREAK

I reclined in the carriage next to Mrs. Stryder as I remembered that day.

I wasn't the beautiful little girl I'd been back then, that was for sure. I shook my head at even the thought of that.

None of us were, were we? All the brave boys in gray were gone. Dead or missing, or worse, home and crippled, or traumatized.

Jasper, my darling brother- he was dead.

My father was no longer such a good father to me. When Jasper didn't return, he resorted to drinking, no doubt trying to forget Jasper.

Mother, she was just a gentle shell of the woman she used to be.

I held an increasing bitterness toward my brother. Because this was all his fault, his fault our family was destroyed. No one forced him to go fight for the Cause, did they?

_I hate you, Jasper Whitlock._

But I didn't.

* * *

Not completely thrilled with the first chapter, so it will probably be re-written and then replaced. Just the same, I decided to post it. Please let me know what you think so far.


	2. Still Here

**To clear up some confusion over the first chapter- Josette was five in the first part. In the second part she was around fifteen. Now she's sixteen. **

**Chapter 2**

_I'll always be here through thick and thin  
You can come to me, I'll listen  
I'm your friend, I won't push you away  
When you need a hug, my arms are wide open  
When you need to talk, I have an open ear  
Your growing up and getting older  
Know that I'm always here, I'm not going anywhere._

Jasper POV

I snarled and heaved the male up over my shoulder, sending him to crashing to the ground behind me. Before he could use it to his advantage, I was already facing him again, ready, lip curled back from my teeth.

"That will be enough, my Major." _Her _voice spoke from behind me. "You've clearly won this fight," she continued as I faced her. "Why not go enjoy a human or two?"

A reward.

I smiled at her as I made my way out of the big barn, heading toward the nearby town.

Almost instantly, my gaze fell upon a young woman crossing the street, un-chaperoned. My eyes narrowed as I assessed her appearance, debating.

Dyed hair. Rouge. Gaudy jewelry, and …. sweet, sweet-scented blood. A whore. No, she would not be missed, and even if she was, the ladies and gentlemen of the town would simply call it a good riddance, believing she had gone away.

Quickly, I glanced around. No witnesses.

In a fraction of a second, I was at her side. She gave a little cry of surprise, but I quickly placed my hand over her mouth.

"I will not hurt you," I lied smoothly, and slipped a handkerchief containing money out of my breast pocket. Taking her hand, I emptied a few gold pieces into her palm, and then put the handkerchief away. "I would like to request your services."

Her wide blue eyes darted over my face, and then she smiled, apparently liking what she saw. I smirked.

"This way, sir," she muttered, leading me down the street. I followed her to her place… my mother would call it a _bad woman _place.

She seemed to know what I wanted, without being told. Intelligent woman – draining her almost seemed to be a waste, if not for the way her blood sang, the way it promised to be wonderful.

The whore began undressing me once safely in the silk sheets of the bed. I grinned, and let her get almost halfway done with my shirt before I sank my teeth into her neck, stifling a moan at the taste of her blood.

She ran dry all too soon, unfortunately, and besides that her blood left a bitter aftertaste. I scowled, disgusted, and arranged her body on the bed so it looked like she had merely died in her sleep, with the exception of the bite mark on her throat. Carelessly, I used my nails to create a gash there…. Good. Now she had been slaughtered by a Yankee. I admired my work.

Under the cover of the night, I left the house to find my next meal.

LINE BREAK

Josette wept in her bedroom that night, just as she did every night. I flinched at the emotions she was putting off.

Fear.

Pain.

Sorrow.

Anger.

Overall, overtaking the rest, was a deep and profound hatred… and I knew it was directed at me.

It was my fault, of course, wasn't it? I was a fool, as she constantly ranted to herself. The Cause was lost almost before the war began.

"Josy, I'm sorry," I murmured, leaning on her windowsill and watching it. My poor baby.

Eventually, her cries faded to the sniffles and whimpers, and I was able to relax as she rose, wiping her face with a handkerchief and returning to bed.

"I'm here, Josy," I told her, still murmuring, so low that she didn't have a hope of hearing. The pain in my chest was sharp and strong as I longed to return home to my family, to ease their agony at my 'death'. "I'm still here for you."

I noticed that I had been there far too long, and Maria would be angry if it were much longer. I would be punished. Sighing at the thought of it, I looked at Josette again. She was still awake. I had a sinking feeling it would be a sleepless night for her.

"Goodnight, Josette."

I dropped back to the ground and took off, my feet moving across the ground swiftly and soundlessly.

Back to Maria, away from my family, away from my human life.

Back to Hell.

_Wherever you are, I'm there with you  
You're in my heart and my prayers  
Just know I'm here, because I truly care  
You're my sister, you mean so much  
Don't want to see you hurt or cry  
I'll wipe the tears, I'll get rid of your fears  
Want to see you grow up and achieve  
Just believe, have faith  
You can do anything  
You're beautiful inside and out  
You're smart and very talented  
You're many things, but most all, you're my sister  
I believe in you and know that I'll never stop loving you_


	3. He Wasn't A Yankee, But A Monster

**My Brother**

**Chapter 3**

_This pain holds me tight  
This pain grabs me with all it's might  
This pain has taken all my will  
This pain is with me till my body lies still_

**Josette POV**

Pulling my shawl over my shoulders, I hurried toward the waiting horse and old, beaten carriage, where my driver was waiting impatiently. Dear Martha needed me, her little Nancy had fallen ill.

He offered me his arm to assist me. I took it, scrambling up into the carriage and settling on the seat. "Thank you."

I watched the houses and the trees as the horses took off, jostling me slightly. But I didn't get long to enjoy the scenery, for the carriage halted abruptly.

"Why are you stopping?" I called up to my driver, annoyed. "Mrs. Fitz is waiting."

The only response I got was a little choking sound and then silence. I shook slightly in fear. Was it the Yankees? Had they killed him? I looked around in a panic, searching for some kind of weapon to defend myself with.

There was a slight gust of wind and then suddenly deep red eyes were boring into mine. I screamed in surprise, throwing my hands up in front of my face. "What-?" I whimpered, and then raised my voice again. "Help! Help! A Yankee-"

The owner of the red eyes laughed softly and grabbed my hand, yanking me out of the carriage and slapping a hand over my mouth. It hurt badly. "I'm no Yankee, young one. I'm far worse than that."

"W-what are you-?" But I didn't get more than that out before white-hot pain started burning through me as his teeth sank into my throat. I screamed and thrashed, only that made it hurt more, and he held me more tightly, so I stopped.

The man- vampire- took deep, steady pulls of my blood. My vision wavered and then vanished completely as the world went black. I whimpered, agonizing pain rushing through me.

Quite suddenly, his arms disappeared from around me and my head thwacked onto the ground.

All was silent.

Everything was calm outside of me. Inside, I was burning, being tortured, screaming at the top of my lungs. When I was sure he was gone, I screamed out loud too. But no one came.

And the fire burned on endlessly.

* * *

Slowly, it began to dull.

Was I dying, then?

Would this torture end? I hoped… I hoped so…

My throat hurt. Why did it hurt so badly?

_Jasper… _a tiny voice in the back of my clouded mind whispered. _Jasper… where are you? Jazzy, take the pain away, oh, please.. make it stop…_

My heart stopped. And so did the pain.

Was I dead? I wondered. But surely heaven wouldn't be like this. My throat still hurt.

Slowly, my eyes opened.

* * *

_This pain is no longer going to guide my fate  
This pain I will control, to point me straight  
This pain, This pain you will always be there  
This pain, This pain no longer will I add to, to be fair_

* * *

**This one was short, but I didn't wanna drag it on forever. R & R.**


	4. Better Off Without Me, Right?

**Please read and review.**

When our boys come home in triumph, brother,  
With the laurels they shall gain;  
When we go to give them welcome, brother,  
We shall look for you in vain.  
We shall wait for your returning, brother,  
Though we know it cannot be;  
For your comrades left you sleeping, brother,  
Underneath a southern tree.

Sleeping to waken  
In this weary world no more;  
Sleeping for your true-lov'd country, brother,  
Sleeping for the flag you bore.

**2 years later**

**Josette POV**

My wet golden hair swung loosely, my worn shoes making no sound as I passed through the trees, rain slowly soaking me. The scents grew stronger as I moved closer to them, eyes narrowing with suspicion. I just hoped this wasn't one of those armies—that would be far too dangerous. I couldn't handle them myself, and they would not think twice about destroying me.

The big farmhouse came into view, looming up through the trees. From the barn came the sound of scuffling, angry screeches, snarling. Newborns, certainly.

Just as I turned to leave, a voice called out, sharply. "Stop right there."

I stopped, fingers curling into fists as I turned back toward the house.

A male vampire with long-ish, curly blond hair crossed the grass toward me, his dark red eyes narrowed.

"Who are you?" he demanded, stopping a short distance away.

"Josette," I muttered. "Josette Whitlock."

Before I had time to react, pain rushed through me as he slammed me into a tree, hand locked around my throat. His cool breath washed over my face as he roared a warning.

I knew better than to struggle—struggle would only cause my inevitable death to come faster. I stayed still.

"What kind of sick game is this?" he snarled at me. "How dare you?"

"How dare I what?"

"Josette Whitlock is dead," he hissed. "Don't you _ever_ say that."

Despite knowing it would only anger him further, I rolled my eyes. "I can assure you, I'm not dead. Now let go of me."

To my surprise, he did, but with a dark, dangerous look on his face. He would grab me again in a heartbeat if I said something wrong—this time, though, he would destroy me.

"What the hell is wrong with you?" he snapped. I could practically see thunderclouds over his head.

"Nothing. I'm Josette. I don't even know you. How could I possibly try to hurt you with a fake name?"

His jaw set, eyes darkening further.

"What's your problem with that name, anyway?" I continued. "Was your mate called Josette?"

"My human sister," he answered, his tone emotionless this time. His head tilted to the side, and he didn't seem quite so angry, thankfully.

I stiffened. "Well.. well, what's your name?" I dreaded hearing the answer. Jasper was dead, it couldn't be him.

"Jasper Whitlock."

I stepped back. No. It was impossible.

"I take it the name is familiar to you," he said. "You know me as the God of War. Don't you?" He looked like he was hoping for a yes.

"No… but Jasper Whitlock was my brother's name…" I managed. Of course, it wasn't him.

Now, rather than anger, his eyes were hopeless and lost. "Your parent's names. What were they, young one?"

I couldn't answer for a minute, but managed it. "Charlotte and Frank Whitlock."

Abruptly, the God of War, as he'd called himself, exploded with rage.

**Jasper POV**

Rage blinded me, the Major released from his cage and racing out, instantly taking control of me.

My glazed eyes rolled over her face as I tried to regain control, tried to recognize her, but the only word registering in my mind was _threat. _

Threat.

Maria had taught me what to do when there was a threat, when there was danger to her, my beloved, my creator, and to me.

And I acted on it.

My sister didn't even scream—that I heard, anyway, - as I lunged for her throat.

LINE BREAK

My hands wrapped around the foolish girl's throat, crushing her windpipe, and then, in one quick movement, severing it from her torso, dropping it on the pile of limbs at my feet. The snapping sound of her head coming off, so familiar, was what pulled me back to myself, just as I pulled the lighter from my pocket.

I froze.

Maria's voice, not real, but whispering in my head, urging me to end this, to burn her while I had the chance.

The little humanity I had left said differently.

This was my sister.

Josette.

The baby of the family.

After a few minutes of struggling internally, that won out. I slipped the lighter back in my pocket, and, exhaling sharply, I began to reattach her limbs.

Once the task was finished, I leaned back against a bleeding tree and waited for her to regain consciousness, waited for her neck to heal. She would be scarred now, and badly.

I wanted to apologize.

That's not what happened.

She opened her eyes and was instantly on her feet, glaring at me with hate-filled eyes, but her emotions were nothing but fearful.

I'm not completely sure what happened next—the Major surfaced again, and I realized she would be better off. I think that's what happened.

"Go to hell, little whore."

**Josette POV**

I was too shocked to respond.

I found my lost brother, and this was how he would treat me after so many years apart?

"What are you waiting for?" he spit at me, words dripping with venom. He straightened so he was no longer leaning on the tree, and took a step toward me. "Get outta here."

I took a step back when he took one forward. I was angry, I wanted to hurt him like he was hurting me, but I didn't have a clue what to say.

"Go!" he roared. "Get outta here!"

And what else was there to do?

I turned and fled.

He looked like my brother. He had my brother's name.

But he was not my brother- the real Jasper, my brother Jasper, he had died in war that day.

You were the first on duty, brother,  
When "to arms" your leader cried-  
You have left the ranks forever, brother,  
You have laid your armies aside.  
From the awful scenes of battle, brother,  
You were set forever free,  
When your comrades left you sleeping, brother,  
Underneath that southern tree.

You have cross'd the clouded river, brother,  
To the mansions of the best,  
"When the wicked cease from troubling," brother,  
"And the weary are at rest."  
Surely we would not recall you, brother,  
But the tears flow fast and free,  
When we think of you sleeping, brother,  
Underneath a southern tree.

-Henry Clay

* * *

**If you want an outtake of Josette waking up as a vampire, ask in your review. Please review. It makes me smile. **

**Update for Not Over Yet will be coming soon.  
**


	5. Notice

[A/N]

So, I have decided, for the time being, that the next several chapters will simply be outtakes and memories of both Josette and Jaspers' lives. Then, after a few of these, I will continue the story from a few years after this point.

Next update will be coming in two weeks at the latest. It would be earlier, but I'm busy.


	6. Outtake 1-- I Can't Do This

**My new cure for writer's block: writing these little outtakes for My Brother. **

**Guys, I'd like it if you would go back and reread chapter 2. Because I was incredibly stupid and didn't realize I uploaded the wrong chapter til just now. *facepalm* So, the correct one is there. I'm so sorry.**

**I'd also like to apologize for my giving up on this story, and the fact that I can't promise it won't happen again. Feel free to nudge me through a review or PM to get me moving. xx**

* * *

**Outtake 1—**_I Can't Do This_

**Jasper POV**

The battle raged around me, but I found I couldn't throw myself into it. I could vaguely hear Peter shouting at me to "do something, damn it!" but over the pounding in my head, growing stronger with every second, I couldn't focus on his words.

Only his warning, screamed at me over the tumult of the battle, broke through to me. I whirled around just in time to prevent myself from being beheaded, by a small newborn. I ducked under and around her blows, her fury battering at me.

Just as I knocked her to the ground with a strong wave of fear, I really caught sight of her face.

She was slight, and looked to be about seventeen. Long blonde hair cascaded over her shoulders and down her back. Even through my red haze of anger, I could make a light dusting of freckles across her nose and cheeks. But it was the fear in her ruby eyes that got to me.

It reminded me of the fear I'd seen in Josette's eyes, so many times.

_Josy? Is that to her?_

I found myself reaching out to her, lips forming the name.

For my efforts, I was rewarded with a sharp stinging pain that jarred me, bringing back to my right frame of mind.

What the hell was I doing?

This was battle.

I could not just go soft, like I just had.

Besides, Josette wouldn't be in such a terrible place.

After our, ah, fight, she'd probably fled, fled to the North, fled out of the country. Who knows where she might've gone? What mattered is that she was safe—safe from me and my monstrous ways, especially.

Besides, looking at the girl, she didn't truly bear much resemblance to Josette. Sure, the freckles, blonde hair, but wouldn't that fit about half the girls in America?

This was not my sister.

All these thoughts passed in just a few seconds time, and in the next, she was dead, her remains thrown to the ground carelessly.

Better focused now, I finally began to truly fight. My efforts ended the battle in only another fifteen minutes, with a victory for us.

We'd only lost five. Maria would be pleased with me today, meaning I would be rewarded.

I sent the army on home, back to our little village (empty of humans, of course.). Then, rather than follow them, I dropped to my knees and buried my face in my hands.

I'd given up my _sister_ for this life.

What was it worth? It was not worth giving her up.

This life of death, of blood, of countless lives wasted over territory. My own personal hell. I should've taken Josette and gone away. Taken her and Peter and gone away.

Because sometimes, I didn't know how long I could make it, living like this.

I couldn't do this forever.

* * *

**Let me know what you think.**


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